Suther Land

new venture

2009-10-13T16:15:00.003-06:00

I decided to take a small step towards a new business this month. Check out my new website--Motherland Photography. I've been a hobby photographer since my teen years and I'm excited to step out into something visual as a foil to my work with words. I'm starting with families and kids, but I have a couple of family weddings booked next summer so I'll see how that goes too.

First month of school

2009-10-13T16:02:00.004-06:00

It's been a month and a half of kindergarten and Bridger loves it. Yesterday he was too sick to go, but he still got all dressed, in coat and hat and backpack and cried while the bus went past our house. I'm glad he likes school, though I'm constantly second-guessing what the right thing is to do for him (and all my kids for that matter).

I had always thought I would try homeschooling, but Bridger and I tend to clash a little and he is so extremely social that I don't want him to wither. But this very social behavior can be troubling for me as I see our family influence getting smaller. Not only is he gone for 8 hours a day, but when he returns, he's got 1-5 friends coming over to our house to play with. At dinnertime, both the boys get upset if no one is coming over for dinner ("ow, just us tonight"). Mom is totally chopped liver, no matter what I'm serving.

Then there's academics. I can't help but think he could be learning more. That is the one place he's complained ("mom, I already know everything). I've instituted a little home-homework, since he was dying for it anyway and I'm volunteering in the class to get a better feel for what's happening.

There's been some new vocabulary and drawings learned (some quite anatomically correct), though that has prompted some really good conversations.

All in all, I know that kindergarten was a good choice for Bridger this year. Doesn't mean public school will always be our choice, but this is where we are now and we are going to embrace the moment.

Discipline

2009-09-01T14:55:00.000-06:00

Today I wanted to post a sweet, cute vignette about the first day of school complete with smiling pictures of my adorable kids. That will have to be tomorrow's post...

After I picked up Asher from preschool today, I decided to head to Costco for a few things and get the two kids (Bridger was still at school) some pizza and an ice cream to celebrate. Shopping at that time of day is always pushing it and by the time we got our lunch, the kids were starving. I got one large twist ice cream for the kids to split for dessert (two cups). Everything was going great until I needed to get one more spoonful from Asher's cup to Eilidh's (she didn't get a full half, obviously).

Asher proceeded to whine about this spoonful. He was not content with his over-half-full cup, he wanted it all. So, I took it away from him. This lead to an all-out screaming fit. I mean screaming and stomping all the way out the door (especially as I threw away his ice cream cup).

On the way to the car, a woman, who perhaps had never had children or had certainly forgotten what it is like to have very small ones, heard him screaming and proceeded to instruct me to and "use discipline, honey." Then while she walked away, commented loudly to anyone who would listen that my child "obviously had never been disciplined a day in his life."

This is not the first time I've had a comment about my kids' temper tantrums in public. Bridger threw some good ones in his threes and Asher's not to be outdone in the category either. But what these busybody folks fail to realize while they witness the fit is the that the tantrum is the RESULT of discipline. If I wanted to be a pushover and keep Asher quiet, I simply would have shushed him and let him keep his ice cream. But he needs to learn to be thankful for his half of the cup and to share with his sister. NOT disciplining would have made my trip to Costco much easier. Moreover, Asher was going to get more of that said discipline once we got to the car, but I thought it prudent to wait until then since I was balancing grocery bags in one hand and a 17-month-old in the other who was dripping her half of the smoothie onto her dress. That lady's lucky I didn't have a hand free for a crossover jab.

The real question is why, when I know I did the right thing, does this bother me so much? It's embarrassing, of course, but there's more than that. Maybe I'm more like my son than I'd like to admit--I haven't yet learned to be happy with my over-half-full ice cream cup. I want it all. You see, I'm happy to take the (many more) compliments I receive about my kids' behavior, but utterly invalidated when a random stranger thinks I'm a bad mom. I like to take the credit, but none of the blame. And my identity is way too tied up in what people think of how my kids' behave, how I mother, how that all reflects on me.

Today, I am going to take some time to remind myself that my identity does not come from how I perform, but from Christ who performed for me (and my kids).

I guess I needed a lesson on the first day of school too.

Easy rider

2009-08-20T19:25:00.006-06:00

There is nothing more quintessentially "kid" than riding bikes--freedom at such a young age to go fast and far, coasting with the wind in your hair.

We had high hopes of Bridger jumping on his (big) two-wheeler this summer without training wheels and whizzing down the bike path with us. That dream was quickly replaced with kicking and screaming if we even suggested riding without the training wheels--in fact he took to riding Asher's tricycle it was so bad. In all fairness, we did buy a high bike (thinking it would be a good value because he could have it for awhile). His feet couldn't touch the ground from the seat and if he jumped off the seat...well, you know how boys bikes are configured.On the recommendation of some friends, we decided to try a balance bike--European inventions where there are no pedals and kids run with the bike, learn the balance of riding and never need training wheels. Since the bike was such a sore spot with Bridger (and because I didn't want to repeat my training wheels debacle with Asher) we decided to get him the balance bike (via grandma and grandpa) for his third birthday in June. All of the sudden, this bicycle stuff was fun again and after about a week of Bridger playing on Asher's bike (and a few fights about sharing), he jumped on a slightly smaller-framed two-wheeler from the neighbor and hasn't looked back. Asher can already coast with his feet up for half a block so I have no doubt he'll be on a two-wheeler next year.

Soon, I'll be seeing a lot of that back shot of the boys pedaling away into the world. Although the thought sticks in my throat, I think I'll enjoy their freedom and a bit of my own!

Picture people

2009-08-11T11:23:00.010-06:00

Bridger: 5 1/2--easiest to pose, hardest to get a true smile.

Asher: 3--enjoys being cute, but can't sit in one place for long

Eilidh: 16months--easiest to get candids, impossible to pose

I like pictures--I take a lot, I'm into photography, our walls are covered with this "art" featuring mostly our kids. I also took the idea of milestone pictures very seriously--3mo, 6mo, 1yr, 2yr--it seemed I was always traipsing to some photo studio in a department store. I couldn't really afford to go to a fabulous photographer, but somehow I just felt like the studio atmosphere would force my kids to at least get one good shot. The last two years have been the worst--trying to get three kids to smile together and separately is a nightmare. Ryan finally kicked some sense into me last fall after a particularly harrowing "studio" experience where he used up his entire day off to fight with the kids then walk the mall with them while I had to endure a hard-sell presentation to spend something like $500 on pictures that weren't all that good to begin with. He said, "why don't you just take their pictures?" and then, the key phrase, "I'll help you"

You see, usually picture day (notoriously Christmas card picture day) is when our marital strife is at its peak. In fact, Ryan is typically the hardest one to convince to even get the camera out so if he was willing to help...maybe this could work.

Ryan made good on his word and we took an evening this July to take some shots of the kids. It wasn't easy and I still don't have one of three of them together that I like, but overall it was a much nicer experience. And it yielded better pictures.

Joshua's 4th birthday memories

2009-07-21T19:08:00.006-06:00

Today would have been Joshua Ryan's 4th birthday and we wanted to make the day special for those of us in the family who still inhabit this earth. We've done something different every year, but we always make it a strictly family day. This year since we just got back from vacation last night, we decided to keep it around home. Our morning began with cinnamon rolls (what Bridger thought Joshua would like). Then we spent most of the day making mosaic stepping stones--one for each child and a special one for Joshua with everyone contributing. If you can tell in the photo, Bridger made Joshua's body, Ryan made a sun and a flowing river, Asher just sort of made a picture and I made a tree.
We made a birdbath and painted some rocks to adorn the garden and a few to take to his grave. This afternoon we started a new tradition of shopping for some gifts Joshua might like if he was 4 years old and then taking them to the local children's shelter. Tonight we'll flip through his baby book and photo album.I'm looking forward to seeing his stepping stone in the garden for years to come--amongst the growing and dying life in its seasons.

Live-in Workman

2009-07-09T22:48:00.009-06:00

Our house has been in an almost constant state of minor redo since we moved in almost three years ago. Paint, chair rails, windows, etc etc. But recently it seems we've had big projects--like the entire basement to tackle. Enter Super-Husband. I am continually amazed at all that Ryan knows how to do around the house--granted sometimes he learns on the fly (I'll not mention the water-heater incident that made the new basement a necessity). Part of the reason is I grew up with a fabulous dad who can be described as many things...handy is not one of them. Dad could wield a hammer and follow directions, but he truly tried to avoid household projects at all costs.Ryan really likes working with his hands--and he's good at it. Sometimes even too much of a perfectionist and I have to remind him that no one's going to notice the mudding job in the back of a closet. He's redone every room in the basement (sometimes with some incredible help from family and friends), but truly mostly on his own on his one day off a week (pastor's don't get real weekends). A few months ago he finally finished the last room of the basement, which is now his office (see the before and after above), and then not two weeks later started another huge overhaul outside building a new fence. As you can see, our previous one was rotting and falling down. Again, we received some awesome help, which we could not have lived without (especially while using the auger!) but Ryan's put some major sweat into the finished product, which was completed tonight.
I'm hoping he can take a rest now from some of these big projects, though I do have a few cupboards that need painting...

Asher hits the big 0-3

2009-06-29T22:25:00.005-06:00

That's right, my blond little guy turned three, and boy was he excited for his birthday. He started to really notice birthdays on Bridger's last, which was in November. Then he had to wait through Daddy's, Mommy's and Eilidh's before it was finally his turn.
Asher is in many ways still the baby of the family, or at least he would like to think he is. In classic middle child fashion, he plays big when he wants to and throws in the little card when it suits his agenda. I know that I've coddled him more than Bridger, and he also enjoys the coddling so it is a hard habit to break. The other day he walked all the way over from the neighbor's raspberry patch with his pants around his ankles because he had peed in the bushes and then claimed he didn't know how to pull his underwear back up. He nearly caused an accident by the hysterics that were induced from the drivers-by. He knows how to pull up his pants, he just wants someone else to do it. Of course, there are things he truly can't do by himself (like lace up his hiking boots) that he will vehemently fight to do independently--I guess he's a typical preschooler.He's the joker of the family and has Eilidh in stitches in no time flat. He's also the biggest cuddler of them all--you can always count on Asher for a great snuggle.

We celebrated with a dinosaur cake and many friends at a nearby park with a screamin' splash deck. I love summer birthdays.

2009-06-24T22:18:00.004-06:00

I don't think I fully realized when we bought this house how much random maintenance there would be. I mean, it took me a good year to figure out how to routinely clean, not to mention pick up clutter and take care of the yard (and various plants and gardens I put in every year). And we have a small house--with only two small bathrooms (my least favorite area to clean)! Last month alone we had the chimney sweeped, the plumbing flushed, the trees trimmed and the carpets cleaned. Granted, most of those items will last us several years, but geez it was an expensive month!

I really find myself hoping that we can make this small house work for the long haul. Most of the time I think we can, but this weekend when Asher crying during naptime threatened to wake everyone in the house while we were recovering from the stomach flu, I start to wonder if we couldn't use a little more space. Occasional inconveniences aside, we love our house. I love that the boys share a small room--they're never scared and they have to learn how to share space. Every time we redo a room or plant a perennial bed I put a little piece of me here (literally--at least a broken fingernail) and I always get the twinge of feeling like we're going to get it just how we like it and then have to move--either because we're called elsewhere or we just plain outgrow the house.

I suppose we could learn to love another house, but please not one with too many bathrooms.

The mom with the yellow hat

2009-05-13T20:47:00.007-06:00

This is how these things happen. We're having a party, it's 11pm and we're trying to wrangle the remaining kids into bed. Asher and two little girls were attempting to go to sleep along in a bed with a toddler in a portacrib beneath them. Needless to say, not much settling down was occurring. Soon we heard some coughing and screaming and Asher seemed to be gagging. I assumed he had too many doritos and we headed to the bathroom. He stopped coughing quickly and then explained that he had swallowed a hair thing. We looked around because I assumed it was a rubber band, but we found both of those. Only one of the 2-inch barrettes was missing.

It took me awhile to figure out what to do. I mean, there are many factors at play here--maybe he's making up a story, after all it is 11:30pm and getting any info out of 2-3 year-olds usually results in nonesense. Let me say that again, it's 11:30 at night--what kind of mother am I to have my kid up that late and apparently so hungry he resorted to eating sparkly metal? There was also the copious amount of margaritas (for me, not Asher: I'm not that bad of a mother). Eventually after some phone calls, I decided to bring him to the ER (it's about 1am by now). Sure enough--the barrette's in his belly (pic 1). The next day, it's in his intestine (pic 2). Good news because it passed all the really small parts and now just has to weave its way through the bowel and on out--"but let us know if he vomits blood or his belly becomes distended and he'll be rushed to surgery." Great.

Thankfully, he ate, drank and pooped to his little heart's content and, though we were diligently searching for its passing, the barrette remained illusive. Today's x-rays confirm that it is gone, though, so I don't care where it went. We also went to the bookstore and bought "Curious George goes to the Hospital" because I remembered an image from when I was a kid of George's x-ray with a puzzle piece inside his stomach. Asher got a kick out of this comraderie. In fact, he's enjoyed all the attention. Hopefully the surgery threats and prune juice will be enough to deter him from doing it again.

After Ryan's kidney stones last month, I have really spent enough time in the ER this year and don't even talk to me about our deductibles.

It is a good story, though--even worthy of Curious George.

Weekly goals

2009-05-02T21:44:00.006-06:00

After several woeful attempts at homeschool preschool this year, I finally settled on something that works for us. My failed attempt this fall was to set up a little schedule with small amounts of time loosely devoted to different things I wanted to teach the kids. I put together six weeks worth of prep sheets, but after all my those were done, I could never find time to do more. Keep in mind--I need prep sheets. I don't do well just throwing things together and my kids can sense my fluster a mile away. If I'm not sure what activity we're doing, things are bound to denegrate into fits followed by Scooby-Doo episodes. (Bridger told me he can learn about mythological creatures by watching Scooby-doo--see what I'm up against?).

I can't be too hard on myself because I took a full-time stint back at my Philly job (from home, obviously) September through February and have been taking other freelance work since. This is also why I finally caved and started the boys in preschool in March. But back to my original premise--something that's working.

Instead of having daily work that I can't really quantify, I started thinking of two or three weekly goals for both the boys. They vary from Bridger learning to tie his shoes and Asher learning to put on his clothes to Bridger counting by 5's and Asher learning to spell his name. We work on mainly those goals each day of the week--sometimes they are really difficult (I admit the tying shoes one is still ongoing) and sometimes they are mastered within a day. Once they feel confident with their knowledge, they complete their goal for Ryan. If he is satisfied, the boys recieve "kid cash" for each of their accomplishments which they can use to buy an extra dessert or tv show.

I'm really excited about this because I feel like it could be something I continue through school to enrich their education. After many hours of thought and prayer, we will be sending Bridger to public FULL day kindergarten next year. Academics isn't the only thing I'm concerned about, but I hope this tradition can continue. Mostly it depends on me continuing to think up interesting goals--and the kids caring enough about Scooby-doo episodes to save up their kid cash.

What's up?

2009-05-02T21:37:00.003-06:00

So my blogging has taken a bit of a hiatus lately. I apologize to anyone who actually checks this anymore and doesn't opt to follow me on twitter (who am I kidding, I don't have time for twitter). It seems that the blog has become more of a place for ruminations, while Facebook and Snapfish take care of the family's need for constant photos. And, though I've had a few random thoughts lately on what might make a good post, I've had absolutely no time to percolate. However, I'm feeling a bit inspired tonight so maybe I'll get something in the hopper. Here's a photo of the kids on Easter for those of you who are still interested...

Eilidh's first year

2009-03-18T09:07:00.001-06:00

It's such a cliche, but this first year of Eilidh's life has gone so fast. Maybe it's also because it's been the last year of my 20's! Eilidh and I are hitting milestones today--1 year and 30 years respectively. Here's a look back at her year in pictures.

Some comments the boys have had about their sister lately:

[Bridger] "Eilidh's so beautiful I wish I could marry her"
[Asher] "I love Eilidh the mostest"

What they had to say about Eilidh's demolishment of her chocolate cake:

[Asher] "Eilidh looks like a bear...or maybe a werewolf"
[Bridger] "She looks half chocolate, half human"

Family Pets

2009-02-21T21:40:00.003-07:00

The Sutherlands have officially taken in our first family pets. Wait for it.....that's right....an ant farm! The grandparents purchased the 9 x 5 inch habitat for Christmas, the ants cost $2 and came in the mail right to our door. These are my kind of pets---low maintenance--scratch that: no maintenance. Well, actually the little dudes do tip over their water thimble and I have to refill that at least once a week. Now, you're probably all saying--you live in Missoula, Montana--doesn't a dog come with the house? Yes, actually we are some of the only people we know without a large mammal in their backyard. And we're open to the idea of a dog (not a cat, never a cat) sometime in the future, just not now. I clean up way too much poop already to add someone else to the mix. I mean, it's not like the kids have been asking for a pet, in fact, they are a bit obsessed with insects--catching them, looking at them under the microscope...squishing them. They love big animals, but Bridger had a nasty reaction to a cat recently and we have plenty of friends with dogs and even goats and chickens for us to enjoy.

And even if they do want a larger pet down the line, the kids need to learn responsibility with something small. Couple more years of this and they can work themselves up to a Betafish.

25 Random Things

2009-02-16T21:44:00.001-07:00

I pulled this together on Facebook so I figured I'd repeat it here as well. I've been so behind on blogging that at least you can all see I'm alive!

Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you.

1. I've never had a cavity, broken a bone or needed glasses.

2. I made it through 28 years and four pregnancies without ever throwing up. That's right, I never vomited in my life (except maybe some baby puke) until a nasty stomach flu flattened me last year.

3. Up until last week when Eilidh weaned herself, I have been pregnant or breastfeeding for the last SIX years straight. So, lest you think that numbers 1 and 2 mean that I never go to the doctor, that's a lot of appointments.

4. Ice cream is my least favorite dessert. The kinds I like best have big chunks of cookies or brownies and I find myself thinking as I dig for them, why don't I just eat a brownie?

5. I may be able to pass up ice cream, but never chocolate--especially if it's warm and gooey...okay and topped with ice cream just to contradict myself.

6. I swallowed my twin in utero. I have pictures, if you're interested.

7. I always wanted to have lots of kids...right now I'm feeling like three is lots.

8. Actually, I have four kids. Three down here and one waiting for us up in heaven. We miss him, but I try to remember that eternity is much longer than this life.

9. I envision my life in 5-year chunks and see myself moving someplace entirely new for each stint. This is weird since I really grew up in one town, but somewhere I caught the nomadic bug and can't seem to kick my wanderlust.

10. I could never be in the medical field because I don't like sick people. I started college in pre-Med until I was honest with myself about that fact. Then I became a much happier Lit major.

11. I think Baseball is the most excruciatingly boring sport to watch.

12. I'm not a cat person, and Ryan's allergic to them. I love him for that.

13. I had great parents and the epitomy of what I would call a normal childhood. I consider this a true blessing.

14. I get an odd excitement out of combing the weekly grocery adds and making a shopping list--even more excited when it's double-coupon day (I'm such a dork).

15. I have always wanted to learn how to shoot a handgun really accurately. Hang out at the shooting range, you know...

16. I get dizzy if I try to read in the car.

17. I am inherently domestic. I love cooking, baking, quilting, gardening, decorating and organizing the life of my family. Unfortunately, I hate cleaning, which is what must be done most with so many little ones.

18. That said, My calmness is unfortunately tied to the cleanliness of my space. I feel very out of control when I'm tripping over toys and the dishes are crusting on the counter. This is something I'm really working on because my housework is literally never done so I end up not resting, and all too often fail to be present with my kids because I'm cleaning up the breakfast dishes.

19. I was a cheerleader in highschool. A good one, not a dumb one.

20. Although it has been the most stretching experience of my life, parenthood is the biggest blessing imaginable. I love my kids and enjoy life with them infinitely more than I could without.

21. When I check on my sleeping kids before I go to bed, my heart swells to three times it's normal size. It's the best part of the day.

22. I like being a pastor's wife. In fact, I always wanted to be in full-time ministry.

23. Speaking of my husband, I must say that I am continually amazed at how well matched we are. Not that we never have conflict, but how well we balance each other in key ways.

24. I worry about the materialism that penetrates the life of my family, as much as we try to combat it. Sometimes I dream of living in a hut somewhere until my kids are teenagers--just to help us all be a little more grateful for all we have been given.

25. I've been trying to do this note for two weeks and have been tagged by at least 6 of you. I don't have enough free time!

Mommy neuroses

2009-01-28T20:34:00.007-07:00

Ever notice how many warnings regarding your children well-being come at you and somehow lodge in your psyche? Lead in toys, plastic in bottles, hormones in milk, germs on that stale gum stuck to the floor. In my quest to be conscientious I tend to go off the deep end, so more often than not I'm trying to silence the nagging feeling in my head that the yogurt I give them now will result in male breast cancer later in life.

This week I've been fighting back my internet "education" on two such topics--immunizations and crawling. I'm actually pretty strong on shots--I've read a lot of research and have come to the informed decision that they won't cause autism (you may disagree with me, but that's not what this post is about). I even opt for those lesser immunizations like varicella ("this one's so I won't get chicken disease, right mom? "sniff" [Bridger]) and even occasionally the flu shot. But, yesterday after my 10-month-old was poked three times, I still couldn't stop myself from testing her to see if she still had all her tricks (clapping, waving). She hasn't even had the MMR yet, which is the one blamed for autism. Somehow, though, I still can't just let it be.

Then there's crawling. Eilidh's been scooting, army-crawling and worming herself across the floor like lightening for several months. She's now walking along furniture and in danger of skipping that all-important cross body coordination of regular crawling. Seriously I've heard so many ridiculously conflicting anecdotes about this milestone. Many people claim they skipped crawling and are obviously high-functioning adults. Then there are these stories of kids who supposedly hit some educational plateau at age 8 or 9 and they finally figure out that it's because they didn't crawl correctly. So their parents have to re-teach them and then they're back on track. I find this fairly silly, but somehow I've still been working with Eilidh on her crawling. She can do it, but most of the time chooses not to.

"Sigh" I think the voices in my head are silenced for another day...

Windows into my world

2009-01-17T21:12:00.003-07:00

Vignettes into the last few months of 2008 (I apologize for the references to bodily functions, but it is my life right now):

In a 24-hour period:
While I was in the shower, Bridger came into the bathroom looking like a chimney sweep. He had slipped while jumping on the couch and dumped a plant on his head and all over the couch.

Asher was messing around with a full jug of cider and dropped it down the stairs where it shattered and splattered all the way down the stairwell.

Eilidh had a volcanic blowout all over the carpet and then rolled in it.

In a one-hour period:
Bridger coughed, gagged and puked on the kitchen floor.
Asher pooped on the dining room floor (he claimed he thought it was going to be a toot).
Eilidh peed on the changing table.

In a five-minute period (Ryan needed my help finding something downstairs):
Bridger spilled grape juice and wiped it up with a white dish rag.
Asher got himself off the toilet after pooping and wiped himself with the handtowel.
Eilidh dumped a bowl of cereal on the floor.

It's really amazing the amount of cleaning up that encompasses my life right now. One minute of time away can equal so much residual damage. But, good things, as well as the unfortunate ones, tend to come in threes.

So what happened this week?
Bridger asked to pray for every meal and gave really insightful thoughts.
Asher wore underwear all week with no accidents.
Eilidh clapped and girgled and smiled every time I looked at her.

How about today? Bridger drew me a picture of he and I holding hands and wrote, "mommy, you are the best mommy" on it
Asher gave me a sweet hug and said, "I love you, mommy" Eilidh waved at me and said, "ha" which is sort of like, "hi"

It's all worth it. Someday I'll be only cleaning up after myself and I'll miss the air-dried mac and cheese stuck to the floor because it means that my little ones have grown.

Just an update

2008-11-26T21:59:00.008-07:00

Working full-time has zapped any opportunity for "free time" that I may have squeezed out of my sleep schedule before. Hence blogging has taken a backseat. Plus, now that I'm putting photos on Facebook, this has been more of a ruminating website. But I was recently reminded that many people still look here for family updates, so here are some photos of what's been going on here recently.There was Halloween, of course, with a Star Wars theme. Leaf raking and playing. A grandma visit. Bridger's 5th birthday. A trip to Philly to visit friends. Seriously, we need to slow down a bit.

2008-10-25T20:44:00.007-06:00

[Bridger] "Mom, did you know you're not supposed to say the "F" word?"
[me] "What's the "F" word?
[Bridger] "butt"
[me] "huh"
(Recent exchange with Bridger over breakfast where no "F" words (butt or otherwise) were even remotely being uttered. Further probing determined a 2nd-grade friend imparted this wisdom.)
So I've been thinking a lot about outside influence on my kids lately as Bridger nears the half-decade mark. I look at little Eilidh--surrounded only by immediate family for almost 100% of her life and I remember Bridger at that age too. Since I've been a mostly at-home mom for these last five years, my kids have had a fairly controlled environment. Of course, it's amazing how those influences trickle in and gradually cut their path a little wider.

I think many of you parents can relate to the moment in the second year of your firstborn's life when your child says something completely random--something that they did not see, hear or learn from you. All you can do is incredulously ask, "where did you hear that?" Then pretty soon it's commonplace. Those kind of moments don't even happen with subsequent kids--all of Bridger's worldly wisdom is trickling down to Asher and soon Eilidh with all the accuracy of playing the telephone game.

I'm not saying that outside influence is bad, in fact much of it is spectacular and necessary, but as I look at shuttling Bridger to school next year it can sometimes put me in a mild panic. I don't think he's going to be smoking behind the tricycles at kindergarten--it's more subtle. Like last week when he came home from the neighbors' house and declared that spiderman wasn't cool anymore--now he's only into Batman and Star Wars. Nevermind that he's never seen any superhero movies and is bored to tears anytime we pop in a LucasFilm.

We have great friends and great neighbors for Bridger to hang out with. Most of these parents are more conscientious than I am. (In fact, last week when I offered our neighbor a snack, he asked if it had hydrogenated oils in it because he's not allowed to eat those. One look at the permanently spreadable, non-refrigerated cheese told me I should search for something else in the cupboard that might not survive a nuclear holocaust). The point is, conscientious or not, no one can control everything that goes into their child, be it reconstituted soybean oil or a belittling comment. That scares me. But I have to trust that the influence we do have over our kids will be enough to tip the scales, that our home will still be where most of the wisdom is imparted and most of all that God is taking care of them when we're not there.

I have to remember that my "control" is really an illusion anyway.

Pass the spreadable cheese.

I approved this message...

2008-10-04T21:16:00.004-06:00

The kids are often asking who John McCain and Barack Obama are since they hear their names on TV and in conversation. Trying to explain presidential candidates to a preschooler and a toddler is almost as ridiculous as the SNL spoofs of the debates. Asher entertained us all summer saying Obama's name over and over--it is kind of phonetically enjoyable to say repeatedly.

NOTE: This video does not endorse any candidate or political party...I'm just not going there.

Growing up too fast

2008-09-29T15:01:00.002-06:00

Here's a video of Eilidh's first taste of solid food this morning. She's been clamoring to be spoon-fed for awhile, and this morning was her chance! As you can see, she's more than ready to make this step.

I uploaded a bunch of new videos of Eilidh for the absentee grandparents, but if you're curious you can see her star in four new videos--sitting, jumping, playing and laughing. Please ignore the background noise and annoying mommy talk.

6 months of Eilidh

2008-09-18T18:13:00.005-06:00

Eilidh turned six months old today and tips the scales at a whopping 18 pounds, 6 ounces--exactly 10 pounds more than at birth. We'll be introducing solids sometime within the next month, but I would like to take a moment to mention that all that girth has come without even a taste of anything but breastmilk.

Why is that important to me? Because so much of motherhood is completely unquantifiable--am I responsible for Bridger's athleticism? Asher's tantrums? Eilidh's sleep habits? Partly, but there are other factors as well. However, this is mine. I mean, not only did I house and grow her from conception, but I've been her sole nourishment for six months. I can take the credit for this--at least the human part of this because pregnancy and babies are such miracle. I'm sure the days are coming when I will feel inadequate about so many things (I certainly do with the boys), but I take some small comfort knowing that as of right now, I've given her all that is humanly possible.

Look at those tootsie-roll arms!

Famine

2008-09-10T21:05:00.005-06:00

I'm sure that in the sea of random and vivid dreams I had while pregnant with Bridger, one of them went something like this: picture a large green field, six healthy cows grazing, frolicking. Enter six sickly cows, sneezing, wheezing, coming to devour the happy cows and walk inside the small smelly barn.

Had I been in Pharaoh's court and had access to a guy like Joseph, I have no doubt he would have interpreted the dream like this, "Ahh, as a mother you will have six beautiful months of happy children who eat dirt and ice cream daily but won't get even the smallest tummy ache. Then will come the six months of famine where merely glancing at a dirty tissue will begin a prolonged house arrest with snot noses, all-night hackfests and barf bags. Oh, and you'll be doomed to repeat the cycle again and again."

Asher caught his first little cold last week. He sported a snotty nose. He was whiny, clingy, awful. No one has had so much as a sniffle since last March, but here we are again on the cusp of a six month stretch where surely someone in the house will be sick.

The trouble is as much as I try to "stockpile" summer days like corn in a silo, it doesn't work. I can't store up health and mete it out later like candy from Halloween. I have to take it all as it comes, so here I am preparing for another day on the couch watching Sesame Street. I guess it's not all bad.

Montana: 10 months of winter, 2 months of relatives

2008-08-23T20:41:00.004-06:00

We've been on our two months (or at least one solid month) of relatives kick and loving it! There's been three nights in August so far when we haven't had someone on our futon. Highlights were definitely favorite cousins from Wisconsin--4 more kids in the house equalled seven kids 10 and under for a week. WOW. Here are some of our recent adventures. I must admit that I'm proud we tackled the Blackfoot with 6 kids in tow (Eilidh stayed home) as well as Bass Creek Trail with all seven. The kids have been loving all the company, grandma and grandpa just took off yesterday. We miss you already!

2008-08-05T21:43:00.003-06:00

Asher stuck his hand on a hot burner last week and immediately blistered his fingers and his heart as he struggled to deal with the pain. I raced to the sink and held his hand under cold water for ten minutes or so. He began to relax and get annoyed that he couldn't get down and play (I'm sure the unscathed part of his hand was freezing) but I knew that the moment we removed the artificial coldness, the burn would begin to hurt again. I also knew it had to be done.

All told we went through about two hours of almost constant screaming as the waves of pain burned under his skin. I would alternate a little ice and try to get him to fall asleep, but he would wake up every 30 seconds in pain. From past experience with burns I knew that that pain was necessary.

I found this experience to be a metaphor for other situations in my life (as so much is in parenting). We are often scathed by suffering: the loss of a loved one, betrayal of a friend. For awhile we can balm the wound, pretend as if it's not there--run it under cold water. But sooner or later we have to let it hurt--and hurt bad--resisting the temptation to soothe ourselves artificially. Only then will the pain begin to subside and fade, though the scar may always remain.

Monday Hikes

2008-07-21T21:31:00.011-06:00

With Ryan's busiest time during the weekend these days, he's begun to take Mondays off. For awhile we would find ourselves doing household projects or yard work, but for the past few months we've gone on a family hike each Monday morning. Sometimes it's just a short hike near town and sometimes we make more of a day out of it. These are pictures of the last few hikes.

It may not seem like much of a break to pack up three kids, sunscreen, camera, backpack, frontpack, camelback, picnic lunch, swimsuits, hats, shoes, fishing polls, bug spray and bear spray all before 9am in the morning. Then once we get to the trailhead, we strap on the kids and the packs, play cheerleader for Bridger when he gets tired, dole out snacks, nurse the baby on downed logs, change diapers on mossy boulders, keep the kids from falling in the creek (sometimes unsuccessfully), jump in after the kids when they do fall in, not to mention the actual hiking, which is tiring too. But this kind of outing is truly relaxing. It's so different than writing a sermon or doing the dishes or changing diapers on the changing table for that matter. There's always surprises like moose or huckleberries. Our minds are truly renewed and the kids get wicked tired.

Today would have been Joshua's third birthday so we headed into Idaho to Jerry Johnson Hot Springs. It was a scenic drive and hike right along the river and we saw a moose just as we arrived at the springs. As you can tell in the pictures, we chose Option B in these "clothing optional" pools (swimming suits)--there were some folks there ahead of us who chose Option A. (Sidebar: why is it always people you really don't want to see naked who are?) Tonight we went out to dinner, roasted marshmallows around the firepit in the backyard and looked through photos of Joshua.

2008-07-08T13:26:00.004-06:00

When people notice that I have two rambunctious boys and then catch a glimpse of the pink dress inside the baby carrier, they always ask me if I was relieved to finally have a girl. I always answer the the same way: "of course I'm thrilled to have a girl, but I would have been just as happy with three little boys." Most of the time, I even believe it.

There are those moments, though, when I feel God's special grace on me because of my little girl. Eilidh's first pool day was one of those times--baby girl swimsuits are so adorable!

Asher's 2!

2008-06-29T13:20:00.003-06:00

Asher turned two years old this weekend. We celebrated with a neighborhood kid BBQ--mostly older women for Asher and he's in love with all of them. He wanted a puppy cake this year, so mommy obliged.

2008-06-21T15:39:00.006-06:00

Determined not to neglect little Eilidh in the family photo album...er blog, here are a few recent shots of the sweet girl.

She's been sleeping 7-9 hours each night for awhile now--what a champ.

Little sister has earned the title "superbaby" to put up with rough "hugs" from the boys, tagging along while running errands sometimes without a spare diaper and still smiling through it all.

So much to say, so little time

2008-06-15T22:29:00.006-06:00

Seems like we've been a bit underwater lately, struggling to keep our heads above. It shouldn't be that way since most of the last month was vacation, but anytime out of routine seems to take a long time to recover. We spent two weeks back in the midwest after some horrendous gas bills driving there (1100 miles one way) and a 3am stop at a hotel right outside the reservation when we just couldn't drive anymore. Then the boys stayed with grandma and grandpa for about five days while we came back and stuck our mouth to the firehouse with home improvement projects.

We also the long weekend with gobs of family down in Nebraska. The pictures are of the kids with piles of their second cousins. Most of our vacation was rainy, though we did manage a day at the poor man's beach (lake) for some sand and water fun. Not exactly our usual yearly trip to the Atlantic, but still enjoyable. The rain actually made us relax more than we probably would have since we couldn't be outside running here and there. It made life a bit miserable for the poor grandparents, though, when they were trying to entertain the mildly homesick boys. Thanks again, mom and dad!

It's late and I'm tired so this is all the update I can muster for tonight.

Why we can't have nice things...

2008-05-19T21:56:00.006-06:00

Although you'd never know it from their innocent faces in this picture, my boys are wild and crazy most of the time. There's the typical boy energy, of course, and then there's those unpredictable events that just leave me shaking my head. Mischief I would have never thought to prohibit or even hope to forsee often require me to pull out the "how to clean almost anything" manual.

Asher, in particular, is one of those kids who is always up to something. If the house is quiet for a few minutes I know he's playing with the toilet plunger or drawing with snot on the couch. To date he hasn't gotten into the medicine cabinet, but I wouldn't put it past him. Here's a sampling of what has happened in our home in the past week:

--I left Asher coloring nicely on the dining room table for about five minutes and returned to him on top of the table with the pepper grinder unscrewed and peppercorns everywhere.

--While Ryan and I were trying to take a few minutes to pray, Bridger took the glue from upstairs (where it's allowed) to the basement to do a project. He couldn't get it to come out fast enough so he unscrewed the whole top and knocked it over where it created a huge pool of Elmers on our new carpet.

--The kids were up before we were one morning and we suddenly heard a crash. I came out to the living room to see two sheepish kids picking up glass shards. Bridger had been trying to put a puzzle on the mantle and it knocked down a picture.

--While I flossed Bridger's teeth one night, Asher was feeling left out so he dumped out the humidifier in his room. The water hit some marker ink that stained the floor and rug.
Most of these things aren't really the kids being naughty so much as just being mischievous we end up laughing about them eventually. So, we have a hard spot on the carpet now, some ink stains in the kids' room and I'm finding peppercorns everywhere but I never expected to keep a perfect house when I became a mom. I wonder what will happen next week...

Mother's Day

2008-05-11T15:09:00.009-06:00

So many things considered "luxury" time items in my life have fallen by the wayside with the birth of Eilidh: blogging, phone calls, personal hygiene. But even though I have less free time, having an infant and two preschool boys is WAY easier than having those same boys plus being 8-9 months pregnant. Eilidh's just such a dream baby and my energy is so much higher now that my body is a bit more my own (except for all those feedings).

Eilidh's sleeping six or so hours at night, she weighed in at 13 pounds, 6 oz at 6 weeks and is smiling regularly. Asher's speaking in sentences, wanting to do everything Bridger (Bobo) does and starting to get rid of his screeching habit but he's still our most sensitive and colicky kid. Bridger is becoming a great helper around the house, running way faster than mommy and reading three-letter words.

For Mother's Day I asked for a family photo shoot so those are some of the pictures. You can see more recent shots here.

Big and little bums

2008-04-24T15:14:00.004-06:00

So I feel the need to give a cloth diaper update now that I have two clothy-bummed kids. Before Eilidh was born, I decided that I didn't want to be washing both of their diapers and I also didn't have enough of the BumGeniuses to go around. So, I found the local diaper service and asked friends who wanted to give me a gift, to contribute to my account. Each week I get a fresh bag of 5 dozen diapers and they take all my dirty ones. On the surface, this is really great, but there have been some hang-ups.

First of all, the style of diapers is different than I'm used to--these are pre-fold and cover diapers, which are basically the old style of diapers--just a cloth and rubber pants. I'm used to the BumGenius that is infinitely more absorbent. This isn't a huge deal because infants' diapers are changed so often anyway that it's fine, but if I would have started out with these diapers with Asher I would have died on the vine. Not to mention, they're useless overnight unless I want Eilidh to wake up every two hours.

However, I will say that I dealing with two kinds of cloth diapers is getting old. I received enough gifts to keep the diaper service for another month, which is about when we're going on vacation anyway (and I'm going to use disposables then). Around then, I'm going to get a little more on the ball with potty training Asher since he'll be almost two, hopefully move him to pull-ups and switch Eilidh to the BumGeniuses. Honestly, after changing Eilidh's mild poo, messing with Asher's is getting really stinky.

As you can see in the picture, Asher is moving out of babyhood in a big way recently. His crib has been replaced by a big-boy bed, potty training is on the horizon and next after that is getting rid of those binkies!

Baptism Video

2008-04-15T12:50:00.002-06:00

Finally got this to work:

Eilidh's Baptism

2008-04-09T20:51:00.004-06:00

Here's a few pictures of Eilidh's baptism last weekend. I took a digital video, but it was uploading for 24 hours and still not done so I'm going to try to edit and post later. It was Ryan's first one and we were able to celebrate with over 65 people at worship that week. Ryan's parents were visiting as well and his sister so it was a great day. Eilidh's wearing the dress and bonnet I was baptized in--it's so fun to finally be able to pass all that on!

Babies don't keep

2008-03-25T13:13:00.003-06:00

Here's a few Easter photos. We had many an egg hunt and I'm not sure how we're going to consume all the candy and purge all the plastic eggs, but it was fun. We also we able to celebrate with our new church as we've begun informal worship--exciting!

A friend of mine turned me on to this little poem which I'm thinking of affixing to my front door in the months to come for all who will enter (and believe me, as a church planter we'll host plenty):

Song for the fifth child

Mother, oh mother, come shake out your cloth!
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing and butter the bread,
Sew on a button and make up a bed.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking!

Oh, I've grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo.)
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
(Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).
The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew
And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo
But I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren't her eyes the most wonderful hue?
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo.)

Oh, cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,
But children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby. Babies don't keep.

by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton (First appeared, Ladies Home Journal, October 1958)

Welcome Eilidh Grace

2008-03-20T13:27:00.007-06:00

Born March 18th, 6:04pm
8 pounds, 6.5oz; 20 inches long

My 29th birthday (and due date) began about 5:30am with regular contractions about 10 minutes apart (just long enough for me to almost fall asleep in between and then be reawakened). I got up and things started moving quicker. The day before I had gone in for some acupuncture that is supposed to encourage labor as well as taking black and blue cohash--herbal supplements for labor. Even though it was my birthday, I was more than ready to have a baby!

Ryan and I headed to the Birth Center around 8am and it was clear that I was starting labor, but still only 4-5cm so I decided to head to the acupuncturist again (conveniently located upstairs). Anytime I sat or laid down, the contractions would slow, so I was able to relax during the 30 minute treatment. By noon I was continuing to dilate, but slowly because the baby was posterior (turned face-forward instead of face-backward) which not only makes it all go slower, it makes for awful back labor. Bridger was this way as well and I remembered the feeling. It was also frustrating because I needed to keep walking to keep things moving, which was making me very tired.

By 4pm I had been stuck at 7 for several hours so I let the midwife break my water. I had been resisting this because I knew from past experience that the pain gets much worse once the insulation's gone. Sure enough, things got moving and very painful. Thankfully there was a nice whirlpool tub that took the edge off a bit. I even tried to have her in the tub, but I couldn't seem to get in a good position, so she ended up being born a land baby at 6:04pm. The delivery was very difficult due to her 95 percentile head (just a shade smaller than Asher's) and her 8 pound, 6.5oz body. It also didn't help that I was so tired! Unfortunately, as her shoulders were delivered we heard a little pop and thought she might have broken something. She was amazingly content, though, and nursed right away. We were all home by 10pm.

We had Eilidh to the pediatrician yesterday and she had to have x-rays during her first day of life. Sure enough, her left arm was broken during the delivery. The doctor just taped it down to her chest a bit and said it would heal within a week. She's such a sweetie that she hasn't fussed about it at all. She seems to have a very calm and happy temperament, which is such a blessing! You'll hear her lungs a bit in the video as the boys had been holding her awhile. Bridger's very gentle, but Asher's so excited about her that he's a bit of a bull in a china shop around her. She'll be tough and protected!

The evolution of the guest room

2008-03-13T16:03:00.009-06:00

We finally whipped the baby's room into shape last night. I was hoping that she was waiting for it to be all ready to pop on out, but no such luck. The upstairs guest room was always going to be the nursery, but it became the repository for random junk from the basement when it flooded last fall (see picture). Unfortunately, I don't have any nice picture of how it used to look--probably because I wasn't expecting the basement flood!

I kept procrastinating getting it done, thinking it might be a good job for mom to help me with when she got here, but I got into nesting a few weeks ago. I enlisted some friends to help me clear, tape and paint. I'm so excited for about how it turned out.

I picked a bright green for the walls and did some built-in accents in baby pink. As you can tell by the pictures, there's still nowhere for the baby to sleep (Ryan has to put the cradle together--Asher's keeping the crib for another few months). You can see the crib bedding in one of the pictures--a simple pink and green stripe. There's nothing for the walls, we need curtains and a rug, but it's all cleared, cleaned and waiting.

The Waiting Game

2008-02-28T20:29:00.005-07:00

I haven't had much time or energy to blog lately and things have been sort of boring around here--cycles of sickness and snow. See picture of most recent snowman (no, I didn't swallow the previous one). I'm huge and exhausted. Alternately feeling guilty for putting the kids in front of the TV so I can nap or feeling guilty at the end of a busy day when I didn't get to lay down and my body is punishing me for it (hoping just me and not the baby). I just can't seem to remember that sometimes you need to put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others.

I've reached the point where the baby's "cooked" and ready to stick a fork in so I guess it could be any day. Physically I'm so ready to have the the baby out, but I'm not sure if I'm quite ready for the baby in the cradle waking me up at night.

I find myself thinking often about what would be the best birth day. I was sort of excited about the possibility of a leap day baby, though maybe the kid would feel gyped out of a "real" birthday. Maybe something with a cool title like "the Ides of March" or St. Patrick's Day. This is all amplified by the fact that I'm due on my birthday, which is about the only day I really don't want to have her. Selfishly, I don't want to be baking a cake and throwing a party on one of the only days of the year I can claim "absolutely no dishes" or "sleeping in until I feel like it." Plus, it would be a little disappointing for the kid too--always having to share a day even when she's a teenager and I'm totally uncool. Not to mention someday when I kick the bucket, she'll have to be a little sad on her birthday since it was my birthday too. It's just better if it's another day all together (are you listening, God?). How about tomorrow?

The doctor is IN

2008-02-06T12:54:00.000-07:00

So I have to relate this great anecdote from our family life. We had our MP community group here last night and Ryan was telling Bridger that he was going to do some teaching. So, Bridger decided to do some teaching/counseling of his own. When one of our friends arrived, he ushered her downstairs and sat down with his notepad and Bible (of the children's variety). Here's how the conversation went:

[Bridger]: So, have you been having any problems?

[Austen]: Well, our dog keeps running away chasing deer. (such a good sport)

[Bridger]: Hmm, why do you think that is? (crosses his legs)

[Austen]: I'm not sure.

[Bridger]: Well, have you thought about getting her a collar and a leash? That might help. (writing on his notepad)
Have you made any progress on you previous problems?

[Austen]: No, I guess not. (trying hard not to laugh by this point)

[Bridger]: Do you feel you have a mission? (This is what Ryan's talk was on last night so he must have heard him talking about it)

[Austen]: Well, maybe we should go up and eat supper.

[Bridger]: First I need to read you some out of the Bible.

He proceeded to read her the first couple of stories from his children's Bible--Adam and Eve, Noah, etc. and then was finally convinced to come up for dinner.

So, if any of you have any problems you'd like to discuss with our resident preschool pastor, just let us know.

2008-01-22T14:16:00.000-07:00

Usually I don't get many black and white pictures taken during the winter because I only shoot in natural light and we're outside a little less. But last week we got a monster snow and it was warm enough to be outside so I got some good shots of the kids playing in the snow. There were also some fall pictures on the roll so I thought I'd include some favorites. Asher was getting a little cold in that last shot.

Sugar and Spice?

2008-01-16T17:03:00.001-07:00

We've always been in the "surprise me" camp when it comes to finding out what gender of child is in my burgeoning belly. The only exception was Joshua, who's only time with us was in the womb, and we wanted to know him as much as we could.

Both of us like the suspense and the excitement of one of the only major good surprises around. We enjoy picking alternate names and imagining our family different ways. It seems to help me during labor to have a puzzle I really want to solve at the end. I truly felt that Bridger was a boy, so his birth wasn't as surprising but I couldn't tap into any maternal mojo with Asher. The same has been true with this pregnancy. After three boys I can't imagine anything else being in there.

But this time we were a little more open to finding out mostly because we're decorating a new room and we are so stumped on names that we wanted to narrow the field a bit. Some of the first ultrasounds weren't conclusive, but at the very last one (28 weeks) we had the doctor write down the gender. On our overnight trip to Denver a few days later we opened the envelope--GIRL!

So we told our families and were excited for a week or so and then began to regret it. Everyone, from those who originally begged us to find out to the check-out girl at Target, suddenly had a story about their cousin's best friend's sister who had their whole nursery decorated in pink, only to give birth to a boy. Mind you, most of these people telling the story had correct ultrasounds for their six children and some of these botched ultrasound stories are from the mid-19th century (or at least ten years ago), but it's getting a little old. Yes, I'm sure those wily boys can sometimes hide their third leg, but I suddenly feel like the first-time mom who is subject to all the emergency highway c-section stories from well-meaning mothers of five.

Needless to say we are thrilled about our HEALTHY baby, girl or boy. And for all of you out there who are excited that I will finally have an ally in the house and want to buy some pink, go right ahead. But according to the rest of the free world, keep the receipt!

Christmas Chaos

2008-01-11T11:12:00.000-07:00

December was incredibly chaotic as Ryan worked every spare moment on getting the basement livable again. I helped as much as I could but mostly just played referee with the kids as we sat and looked at each other on one room of the house for the month. I streamlined my decorating for Christmas, but we couldn't go without a tree even though we didn't have time to go cut one this year (but somehow we still ended up with Charlie Brown style, as you can see).

We had planned on having Christmas ourselves at home, which was really fun as the boys are getting to be great ages. We've adopted one of the Sutherland family traditions, which is a special scavenger hunt for the final big present and it was so fun to write the clues and then see Bridger solve them.

Ryan worked his tail off that week drywalling, priming, painting, tiling, plumbing, trimming and all sorts of other things (with some outside help, but mostly on his own) and finished the main room enough to get carpet installed on the 28th and we left that night for the 15-hour trip to Bailey, CO and the Sutherland clan.

We hit the Denver zoo in our snowpants, went sledding and enjoyed lots of food and family before we had to jump back in the car for the ride home.

This is mostly for the grandparents

2007-12-21T18:16:00.001-07:00

Here's some footage of Bridger's preschool Christmas program. I realize no one other than immediate family cares about this much, but here it is nonetheless.

Two growing boys

2007-12-05T21:32:00.000-07:00

I wanted to update you all on what's going on day by day with the boys as they seem to be growing up before our eyes.

Bridger is coloring, drawing and writing constantly. He's enjoying preschool more and telling me lots of Bible stories from there. Castles, knights and dragons are his favorite toys--especially if they're scary. He's had some great lines lately too. Here are a few:

[Bridger]"Mommy, can I name the new baby?"
[me] "Well, do you have anything picked out?"
[Bridger] "No, but I didn't get to name myself or Asher."
[me] "Good point"
So far he's come up with Bob for a boy or Susan for a girl. I guess he's a little more traditional than his parents...

"Grandpa, why do you live in a forest? Oh, I know, so you can hang a deer from every tree." (it was hunting season last time we were home)

During brother bubble bathtime:
[me] "what was that sound, did Asher poop?"
[Bridger, exasperated] "Mom, poop floats!"

"Why did God make pinkies? The nails are so hard to clip."Asher doesn't have many lines yet, but he's adding a crazy amount of new words daily. His first official word combination was "more candy" and I hate to admit that included in his 17-month vocabulary are the words cake, cookie, chocolate, candy and treat. I'm so proud. Mostly I hear "mommy, pup" all day, which means, "mommy, PICK ME UP" or I simply listen to a chorus of "mommy" for no particular reason.

Asher's mostly into anything his big brother is doing including coloring with markers (thank goodness for washables). He has always held his writing utensils correctly which is such a trip to see because he concentrates so hard on those scribbles. Plus, as you can see from the picture, he's already reading the classics, so I guess his large cranium might be of some use after all. He's a born snuggler and loves to hug and kiss all of us.

Both the boys are happy and healthy as we end 2007 so we couldn't be more thankful.

Giving thanks

2007-12-02T22:34:00.000-07:00

So, I've found myself complaining a bit recently mostly due to the fact that our basement flooded the week before Thanksgiving because of a water heater snafu and that same week we received a foot of snow and a cold snap (picture included of our back yard). We've all been a bit stir-crazy and I'm feeling it. However, there is much to be thankful for as insurance is covering our damage and we're going to end up with a much nicer basement in the end (I'm praying before baby 3 arrives).
Plus we did still get to go visit family in South Dakota for the holiday and we made it in one piece after driving 600 miles through a blizzard on the way there. My brother brought home his awesome girlfriend and lots of extended family came up for the event which included a 35lb turkey raised on the farm next door and "harvested" just a few days prior.
I'm working on some kid updates as they have been so cute lately, but my office has been displaced so it's hard to get on the computer.

Four Candles

2007-11-12T22:23:00.001-07:00

(Click on the pictures to enlarge)

Bridger turned four years old on the 5th of November and we celebrated over about two weeks as Grandma was visiting, then aunt Missy, then it was his actual birthday and then the next weekend he had a party with his friends.

On the day of his birthday, we made monkey bread, opened presents, went to the pool as a family and enjoyed a really fun day.

This year I was planning on having it all low-key--maybe having a couple of his friends over for cake and a movie or something. But a friend of mine wanted to have a joint party at a gymnastics gym in town so we went a little bigger than I was originally thinking (seemed like at least 100 preschoolers).
The kids had a great time, but boy was I wiped by the end of the afternoon. I had spent the morning frosting his requested dragon cake (I bit off a bit more than I could chew on that one too). If it seems a little "scary," it's supposed to be. Bridger's very into scary things right now. I'm still processing the fact that I have a four-year-old, but honestly most of the time he seems about ten.

The video is of Bridger "flying" as they hooked up the birthday boys to the acrobatic apparatus ropes. The best part of this wasn't captured on film because my card was full of other random video (typical) but after this they flew his back and forth like Peter Pan--it made me want to be a bird too!

A spider and a tiger

2007-11-01T20:44:00.000-06:00

Tricking and treating is such fun with two little guys! We started the evening carving pumpkins. Well, Ryan carved them--I swear those things are getting thicker or I'm just getting weaker.

We scoured the area well and traveled with several masked avengers from the neighborhood. Halloween is such a great time to meet neighbors and connect with ones we haven't seen in awhile.

In other Sutherland trivia, this week marks our year anniversary in Missoula!

2007-10-30T09:59:00.000-06:00

Grandma came out to visit last week and we enjoyed some beautiful fall weather. I'm afraid she was more tired when she got home from this "vacation" but we are certainly the better for it. Mom helped me organize my sewing/storage/preschool room and even painted it for me! She also finished some curtains and helped with the kids while Ryan and I plugged away at the million and one yard projects that have been piling up. We're all missing you already!

A little free time

2007-10-29T14:54:00.000-06:00

Last weekend I got the privilege of spending 3 1/2 days pretending to be footloose and fancy-free. I flew into Minneapolis to meet up with my mom, aunts and cousins. Here's some pictures of the cousins enjoying the scenery and the mall of america, of course. I missed the kids and Ryan, but I needed a little break especially since the night before I flew out we were up all night with Bridger's head in the toilet!

Some recent pictures

2007-10-17T22:08:00.000-06:00

Life has been busy lately, but I thought I'd post a few recent fall favorites. We were given tickets to a Griz game and, of course lots of pumpkin stuff lately.

Are we there yet?

2007-10-02T11:38:00.000-06:00

Our last week was spent trekking 2200 miles through 5 western states, mostly with the kids in tow. Ryan and Christian had a conference in Montrose, CO and a church-planter retreat which included wives in Nederland so we packed into the Cryder's Excursion and tried to enjoy the ride. The kids stayed with their grandparents in Bailey for part of the week and even got to hang with their uncles Dirk and Nick. All in all they did well in the car, though Asher's just at a tough age because he's not really interested in coloring or watching a movie, but he knows he does not what to be in the carseat. It reminded me of our marathon 5000 mile trip last year. The mountain foliage was incredible, but the best scenery moment was the giant harvest moon coming over the SW Rockies at sunset. Truly incredible.

Toddling

2007-09-30T13:57:00.000-06:00

So Asher's been learning to walk for the last three months. He can walk by himself across a room, but still chooses to crawl at least 75% of the time (usually because he's trying to get somewhere FAST). One would think he would be clamoring to be a big boy in this way since he insists on eating only with a spoon and fork, washing himself in the tub and coloring with his own markers. He's adding several new words a day and finally figured out how to go DOWN the stairs. Both of these have decreased his screaming habit significantly. The video features some walking and his best baby trick--the cheesy smile. He developed it himself.

Plum Bummed!

2007-09-16T14:21:00.000-06:00

So after all my glowing reports regarding the cloth diaper scene and BumGenius in particular, about a month ago my diapers started dying. Asher had crib-clearing leaks several days in a row and I finally realized it was because the elastic around the legs was stretched beyond repair. Once I looked at my diapers, several had lost elasticity and it seemed that with every wash, more and more would be ruined. Within a few weeks, 14 out of the 21 diapers I originally had with Asher could no longer be used without dire and disgusting consequences.

So, I reached out to cottonbabies.com with my disappointment. They were very helpful and offered to replace all the diapers that were ruined. Apparently I had been using some "unapproved" detergents, but back when I bought the diapers, they didn't really know which ones could be problematic so they're sending me 14 brand-new diapers. Since I sent these in, two more have gone to the happy-hunting ground, but I'm still working with 5 diapers right now that seem to be holding up (I think because I received them as gifts a few months after some of the originals, so I expect they won't hold out much longer either). And my new diapers are on their way along with the new list of detergents I'm supposed to use, none of which I have heard of. I'm sure I can find one or two at the whole food store in town. I'll keep you posted on whether or not these new ones make it more than a year (especially with two kids in diapers!).

Big belly news

2007-09-07T22:52:00.000-06:00

So, we are back on the baby train and excited about another little Sutherland. Everyone is pressuring for a girl, though I don't know what I'm supposed to do about it now! Even Bridger has told me several times that he knows in his heart it's a girl. When we told him the news he immediately closed his eyes and said, "dear God and Jesus, I wish for a girl"--clearly we have some trinity doctrinal issues to work through, but that's why he's in preschool, right? We never find out what gender we're having, though we're mildly tempted this time. I guess we'll see how it plays out. The ultrasounds are looking good, but we can always use prayer, especially in light of previous complications. Oh, and the baby's due on my birthday (March 18th).

First day of preschool

2007-09-06T20:56:00.000-06:00

Bridger started preschool this week and was really excited (especially about his spiderman backpack). I went back and forth on this decision, but finally settled on sending him 3 mornings a week to a small church preschool near our house. He doesn't get any consistent Sunday School so this will take the place of that and also allow him some social and learning time away from home. I'm still planning on homeschooling, but I really wanted to see how Bridger would do with another teacher because he's very strong-willed.

He seems to like it, though he doesn't seem to love it, of course it's only been a few days. The first day he came home with a coloring page to color and then return. He told me,
"I'll color the page, but I don't need to bring it back, mom"
[me]: "But, you'll get a sticker by your name"
[Bridger]: "Why would I want a sticker?"

Good question. He's just not that motivated by stickers and clapping. Hopefully the teacher can adapt.

Family fun

2007-09-03T14:11:00.000-06:00

Nana and Papa visited us in their RV for the last week of summer and we had a great time. We spent time playing outside and swimming and seeing the sights around town. The kids loved having them here and I know they loved Asher's little voice calling "nana" and "papa" even when it was at 7am!

Our wedding anniversary was this Sunday, so as an awesome treat to us, the grandparents took the kids camping in the RV near Bozeman Thursday and Friday. They were able to enjoy the RV and spend time with Aunt Missy in Bozeman. We met up with them on Saturday and came home Sunday, but were able to have two days and two nights to ourselves at home. It's been over a year since we've had an overnight away from the kids, but I can't ever remember being able to stay home--very relaxing and restful!
While they were camping, Bridger became completely comfortable "swimming" all around the campground pool with his life-vest. Previously he's been great in the water if he could touch, but scared, even with a floaty, anywhere else. All of the sudden he's doggy-paddling all around, going underwater--everything. Time away from the parents can be good independence building.

Yard Sale find of the year

2007-08-21T21:07:00.000-06:00

For those of you who know me, it will not come as a surprise that I have been learning my way to the obscure places in town via yard sales this summer. It may be early, but I'm declaring this my yard sale bargain of the year--a beautiful bunkbed with a built-in dresser, bookshelf and desk with drawers for $40. Other front-runners were the tub of awesome action figures I picked up for 1 dollar and the gaggle of art supplies I foraged at an old daycare for $2.

Bridger loves it and once Asher's out of the crib, he'll have a bed on the bottom perpendicular to the top bunk.

2007-08-15T21:49:00.000-06:00

So we bought our first new car last week--a Dodge Durango. We had been thinking of buying a new car for awhile, especially after our camping trip where the Honda was sorely overworked. But, no payment and good gas mileage was keeping us in the trusty Accord. When the grandparents were here, we decided to visit a few dealerships since we had babysitters. After four hours and five dealerships, we were disappointed to find nothing in our price range, though we did get to drive some fun jeeps.

We were looking for three rows of seats and the only perk we cared about was leather--the cloth seats in the Honda were pretty nasty after the kids. The last place we tried had the Durango with everything we wanted and nothing we didn't. Most of the other vehicles we perused had unnecessary stuff like big subwoffers and fancy rims. We do not need to be the pimped-out pastors family. Anyway, we figured we should pull the trigger since it was 10 grand less than everything we'd seen that day. FIVE hours later after much annoying haggling and saying goodbye to the Honda, we drove away with the car and (we think) a good deal. Ryan played hard-ball and I was exhausted. The kids love it, but filling up physically painful.

2007-08-08T13:40:00.000-06:00

Grandma and Grandpa were out visiting the last week or so and we've been all over the town and on a few day trips around the area. They saw it all in terms of mountain climate--it was over 100 degrees the first two days they were here. Then, the fires erupted right around us and the valley was like a campfire for a few days--literally everything smelled of smoke and we couldn't see the mountain that's right in town much less the sun (see top left pictures from the M, first one is from a clear July morning and second from last week). Miraculously the weather cooled a bit the last few days and the fires calmed so it cleared out and has been absolutely gorgeous. We got a surprise visit from Papa for the week too since he's the regional fire director and had to come assess all the damage around here. He's still in town, but traveling and working so we haven't seen him much. Having the grandparents visit is always a blessing from many levels. We get to enjoy extra adult company and play games in the evening (mostly Cities and Knights), Ryan and I are able to have a date night--we went to a great dinner and saw Away from Her, a Canadian film we highly recommend. We also can finish some projects around the house that have been languishing. We whipped up a landscaping project in our alley. When we moved it the area was full of debris and has been a bed for waist-high weeds this summer, but we managed to dig it out, cover it with rock, and transplant some raspberry and blackberry plants for next year's harvest. I wish we had a before shot, but here's the after. We also bought our first car, but that deserves its own post so I'll leave that for later.

2 years

2007-07-24T11:00:00.001-06:00

Joshua Ryan would have been two years old this past weekend and we've decided to always spend his birthday having fun as a family, remembering him and rejoicing in the family that we have been blessed to still have on earth. We decided to go camping this weekend up at Placid Lake--our first attempt with both kids. I think I remember why I enjoyed camping so much as a child--my parents did all the work. Boy it was a lot of work for basically 24 hours in the woods. We had some tense times, but also some fun times and it will definitely be a memory. This is a picture of the family at Morrell Falls which was about a 2 .5 mile hike one way. Bridger did great on the way in, but there was some whining on the way out. We spent time looking at Joshua's pictures and talking about him with Bridger. We miss you baby Josh!

Bum genuis or jaded? (Part IV)

2007-07-16T17:19:00.000-06:00

So I had to put an update in after 1 year of cloth diapers. We've been using Bum Genius diapers with Asher since birth--the same ones, they're all sizes in one. If you want to read more about our journey you can look here on my previous posts.

The diapers have held out extremely well despite washings several times a week. Because Asher is older now and not nursing anymore, I can get away with only four to five diapers a day without any wetness. From about 10-12 months, I had to put him in disposables overnight because he would be wet in the morning, but after he weaned, that problem was eliminated and now he's fine with a cloth overnight.

Estimating conservatively, disposable diapers cost around $1100 per year. The cloth diapers cost $250 and I also had to buy about $100 worth of disposables for trips and overnights. Of course, there are costs of water for washing, which I can't really quantify, but I think it's safe to say that our family has saved money through cloth in this first year alone. Even more impressive is the lack of landfill space. According to Mothering.com, "disposable diapers make up the third largest source of solid waste in landfills" and I'm happy not to contribute too much to this. I don't have any delusions of being entirely green, but I do think that little things can help.

In regards to Asher's comfort, the only time he has ever had diaper rash was when we were on vacation and he was in disposables for a couple of weeks. However, that was when he learned to crawl as well, which reinforces my suspicion that the bulky bum may have delayed his crawling a bit because he wasn't strong enough to lift his huge head and bum! Even if this very unscientific tidbit is true, it wouldn't be enough for me to not use these on another child.

HOT

2007-07-15T14:45:00.000-06:00

By my records it's been 20 straight days of highs in either the 90's or 100's--no clouds and no rain and this weather shows no signs of stopping. My lawn is dying, my flowers are drying, my kids are crying. Global warming's killing me...

What it looks like to be "outdoorsy" with two kids

2007-07-06T15:07:00.000-06:00

So we live in these beautiful mountains with lakes and hiking trails galore, but still find it hard to get out and do anything outdoors with our schedule and the two kids. Lately, though, we've just decided to spontaneously get out instead of analyzing who will miss naps and what kind of five-food-group meal needs to be packed. Last week we went up Blue Mountain and waded in the water while Ryan fished. We've been wanting to check out Rock Creek, which is a blue-ribbon trout stream (not quite sure what that means except the fishing's good) so we spent some time up there last weekend when Aunt Missy was visiting (those are the pictures with the drawbridge). We celebrated the 4th by rafting the Clark Fork River with some friends. At this point in the summer, the river is low enough that the rapids are really minor and the kids had a great time. And earlier this week, in a stunning display of early-morning gusto we hiked up the M.

For those of you who aren't from Montana, most cities here with adjacent foothills have a letter or two on the mountain pertaining to a highschool or college and a trail up to it. The M (for the University of Montana) trail allows you to view the entire city and surrounding valley and mountains. We wanted to have fairly low expectations with Bridger hiking it himself and Asher was in the backpack. The trail is "easy" for seasoned hikers, but steep switchbacks are not kind to those of us who just aren't in college hiking shape anymore. We stopped fairly frequently, but still made it up the 3/4 mile trail in less than 30 minutes. It was nice to have the kids as our excuse for going it slowly, especially when the iron-man senior citizens passed us. Hope they didn't notice I was panting even though I'm 28 years old didn't have a 25lb child on my back. Bridger really enjoyed the sense of accomplishment--working through something difficult and prevailing. We hope to continue hiking short trails around the valley and hopefully gaining our mountain legs.

Why don't bicycles have kickstands anymore?

2007-07-05T10:15:00.000-06:00

Okay so I've been doing more commuting with my bike and the kids in the trailer. I have one HUGE problem, however, which is that my darn bike falls over all the time. It takes a good 10 minutes to get the kids all set in the trailer all the while I'm trying to keep my bike from falling over on them or on me. Even if I rest it somewhere, the trailer moves a bit and it falls down. When I'm only riding myself, I have to throw the bike down or spend time adjusting and balancing it just right. There is a simple solution to this, however--KICKSTANDS. When did they become uncool? I totally understand that if you're doing competitive biking or mountain biking it might get in the way, but bicycles are being prolifically used by commuters now and what is the harm in a little metal bar on the side?

Asher's birthday party

2007-07-03T15:42:00.001-06:00

We had a little birthday party with some friends of Asher's last Saturday in the backyard. Of course, most families had kids Bridger's age too so we invited everyone and Bridger and we mom and dad got a fun BBQ party as well. I made a train cake for him, which he chowed. The black and blue frosting was under his fingernails for days. I love this picture of all the kids here--I can't believe we go them all to sit there at once.

Happy 1st Birthday Asher!

2007-06-29T16:00:00.000-06:00

We woke Asher up with waffles as presents today for his FIRST birthday. He's having some friends over for cake tomorrow.

I prepared this slideshow of Asher's first year and was pretty happy to find so many good pictures of him alone--not with big brother. You can see all the pictures with captions here or by clicking on the link to the right that says view/download photos. Enjoy!

A few new tricks

2007-06-19T08:43:00.000-06:00

Here's a short video of Asher crawling and blowing kisses.

The Garden City

2007-06-13T16:32:00.000-06:00

Missoula's officially called the Garden City and, although it was coined because of a large local garden that isn't around anymore, it seems that gardening is a big deal here. We bought our house in November when pretty much everything was dead and have been blessed with an amazing crop of perennials all around the house blooming and surprising us each week it seems. Because a lot of the big work is already done, it's been so fun to spray some water, pull a few weeds, transplant a few volunteers and feel like giant green thumb. I'm sure I've pulled a few flowers thinking they were weeds, but thankfully there's a learning curve. With the addition of a few pots and hanging baskets of annuals, the house looks great. We also put in a small patch of vegetables in the garden area in the backyard--mostly some peppers and tomatoes. You can see a few more pictures here.

I'm already dreaming and scheming of more plantings and flower beds for next year. I'm hoping to get some things started from seed and do a little greenhouse inside, but we'll see if that actually happens. Right now I'm pleased as punch to be able to cut fresh flowers weekly for my table and I can't wait for BLT's right out of the garden.

a little trouble on the re-entry

2007-06-11T22:00:00.000-06:00

So, I'm finally above water here a week after getting back into the swing of things. Last Tuesday I had some sort of violent allergic reaction that lasted four days and I have no idea what it was from. The worst part was I had to get on some medication to slow the reaction, which meant I had to cold-turkey wean Asher which meant he pretty much screamed all week in addition to my malaise. Anyway, I'm on the other side of all that now but still tired...

Asher still hasn't forgiven me and I feel like his babyhood was taken away in an instant--even though I was already in the process of weaning. That and he's all of the sudden into everything. Someone tell me why it takes me 10 minutes of effort to open a DVD case but somehow my 11-month old can do it.

Vacation

2007-06-06T19:27:00.000-06:00

We just returned from a two week plus vacation and are slowly returning to reality (I keep forgetting that I have to make dinner each night). The trip was fabulous, though it involved planes, trains and automobiles--well, at least two of those! Here are some pictures and memorable moments from the weeks (notice I didn't say "highlights" because some of the memories weren't so high):

--18-hour car ride in one day (6am MST to midnight CST)--the kids held up remarkably well
--Relaxing at grandma and grandpa's
--Asher's first plane ride

--meeting 12 babies that have been born in the year we've been away from Philly, 13 babies if you count Asher. The oldest was 11 months and the youngest just four weeks old. (Asher, Jack, Anna, Sam, Mary, Adelaide, Alexander, Elijah, Kaelin, Sophie, another Anna, Evan and Matthew). As a sidebar, it's kind of interesting looking at these names--most are very traditional and five start with the letter A.

--Enjoying the fellowship and hospitality of so many old friends and feeling like we never left.
--Asher cutting his first tooth
--Sprinklers and mud with my friends (Bridger's favorite)
--Basketball with the boys (Ryan's favorite)
--Learning to crawl at the shore (Asher's favorite)
--Rita's!
--New Life Sunday service
--First dip in the ocean for Asher and great boldness in the waves for Bridger
--Bridger's first side-of-the-road #2 stop (there's not many rest stops in the plains of SD, WY and MT.All in all it was an encouraging and refreshing trip. If you want to get Ryan's take on the trip check out his post here and you can also see more adorable beach pictures at Amy's blog. And can I just say that the picture with Bridger, Eden and Isabel should be in a Pottery Barn catalog or Gap kids or something. We could never have coordinated those outfits if we had tried--Perfect!

Newspaper

2007-05-16T21:55:00.000-06:00

I've always enjoyed reading the paper, though I've never had it regularly delivered. When we moved here, I called up the local paper The Missoulian to get their promotional newcomer deal. So, we've received the paper every morning for the past five months. I really liked it to begin with and it helped us get acquainted with the community and find out about events. However, lately it's been really stressing me out.I've hardly read any books for months because every time I have a moment to read, there's the paper strewn about--or worse--still rolled neatly from the morning or even a few days ago, indicating no one has even browsed it. I feel somehow obligated to at least page through and read a few articles, not because we paid for it, but because this mass of words is constantly in front of me--indicting me for not making time to emerge from my domestic bubble and educate myself about Darfur or something. Pages are always covering the dining room table, strewn across the floor where Asher plays with it and gets all inky, overflowing the recycling bin. Needless to say, when the promotional period runs out, we will not be renewing our daily subscription--and I will probably miss it a little. I think we'll just get the Sunday paper because it's realistic to get that read before the next one comes, and Bridger can still have his comics.

2007-05-13T21:08:00.000-06:00

Happy Mother's Day to all you moms out there. I really enjoyed what I consider to be my "first" mother's day this year. Every other year mother's day has fallen in the midst of finals for Ryan and, though he tried to pull together something, I always felt guilty even having him cook a meal. No guilt this year!
I enjoyed sleeping in, mother's style (going back to sleep after nursing Asher at 6:30), breakfast in bed, baked ham and all the fixings for lunch with no cooking or clean-up, a two-hour nap and a long bike ride by the river tonight with the kids. I'm so excited because we just bought a pull-behind bike caddy for the kids. Plus, Ryan just finished fixing up a bike for me at the Free Cycles shop where he volunteers weekly. It's a really awesome idea where volunteers help folks fix up old bikes or build bikes from parts and then give them away free. We're trying to do more biking and walking to keep to just one car and get on the "green" bandwagon. Ryan hardly ever drives and I walk as much as I can. Most of my errands are within walking distance, but everything I need to do is within biking distance so I'm really excited!

2007-05-09T15:32:00.000-06:00

I had a few minutes yesterday so I took some black and white shots of Asher. I enlarged a few of my previous photos of Bridger for "art" in our living room and now I need a few of Asher. Here are some favorites.

A few funny lines

2007-04-25T21:48:00.000-06:00

Bridger's been cracking me up this week and I'm afraid I'll forget these if I don't write them down:

"Mom, can we go to the RV?" (he means arcade, where I realized he doesn't even need tokens to think he's playing the games)

"I realize that, mom "sigh"" (when I'm trying to correct him)

"Mom, what's booty?" (after playing with some older kids at the playground--by the way, I told him it was a shoe)

"Why is that girl wearing a diaper?" (spoken about a girl in a leotard at gymnastics. After conversing about it all the way home, he's still confused as to why she wasn't wearing pants)

His best this week needed no words. We were at a downtown park barbecue with perhaps 200 people around sitting on the grass. We look over to see Bridger with his pants around his ankles, peeing downhill (as he has been taught) right in the middle of everything.

Day of Firsts

2007-04-15T23:06:00.000-06:00

Today was a great day of firsts as Asher said his first word, "ball" (just like his brother - this was Bridger's first word too). Actually, he said it first on Friday and it isn't so much that he said the word, but made an obvious association between the word, "ball" and an actual ball. At any rate, we're not quite ready to rush to the baby book to record it. The irony is that, unlike Ryan did with Bridger, we haven't really even played ball much with Asher. This led to the other first today when Bridger and Asher played ball together - for the first time. It was so cute. Check it out:

It was also a day of "finally's." Rachel finally picked a color for the kitchen and we finally finished putting it on the wall!

Asher's Jumping Jacks

2007-04-15T22:12:00.000-06:00

Upgrading

2007-04-13T21:03:00.000-06:00

We're tackling a few minor home improvement projects and I have the first pictures of something finally done! Aunt Missy and her boyfriend Kael (who happens to own a drywall and painting business) came up for Easter weekend and we put them through a grueling 18-hour painting day on Saturday. Our goal was putting a chair rail in the boys' room plus painting it and also painting the kitchen. Here are some before and after's of the kids' room--animal themed, of course. You can click on the pictures to see them larger.

Before:

During
After:

We really wanted the kids' room done in a day so we weren't moving furniture in and out and finding places for them to sleep. I was agonizing over paint colors in the kitchen so we're still tweaking that, but there will be pictures and a story to follow. We also had contractors here all week last week cutting out french doors to the backyard. There's still dust all over the house, but the door will be great--so will the deck which Ryan promises to build in his spare time!

Easter

2007-04-09T19:53:00.000-06:00

Our family celebrated Christ's resurrection with a wonderful sunrise gathering overlooking the river, presided over by Ryan. Then an Easter brunch with friends, a traditional church service, family egg hunting at the house with the kids' favorite aunt then a long nap! The temp tipped off at 75 degrees so we grilled dinner and spent the evening in the yard.

Here's the tired Easter boys after the early rise and lots of egg hunting (notice Bridger's "basket cramp")

Emerging craziness

2007-04-03T20:45:00.000-06:00

So, this isn't normal fare for my blog, but I heard something today that I just had to write about. I caught a sound bite on the radio about the Southern Baptist Convention saying they would not support any church that would allow R-rated movies. This intrigued me so I googled it tonight and found this article that is frankly quite frightening.

The gist is that this influential Southern Baptist is coming out against any sort of "emerging" church, which is a really broadly-used and generally misunderstood term. Even though we in Missoula are quite unconventional, we would hesitate to plant roots in the "emerging" camp as the term is really confusing and can go really overboard. However, this particular leader appears to be mostly concerned with alcohol and R-rated movies--not a thing about the gospel. No wonder people are scared of the church!

The Tuesday outfit

2007-04-03T15:06:00.000-06:00

Here is a picture of Bridger in his standard Tuesday outfit--Red Thomas shirt and orange swishies. Why Tuesday, you ask? I only do laundry on Mondays (except diapers, which have to be done all week) so everything is clean on Tuesday and Bridger picks out his own clothes, hence his favorite outfit. He had never even see the Thomas show until a few months ago when he thought it was too boring to even sit through, but somehow this is still his favorite shirt--the power of marketing...

My cousin gave me the heads-up on getting all laundry out of the way in one day and I really like it. Otherwise I feel like I'm constantly doing it. I've also adopted a "cleaning day" of the week as well--Thursdays. I do all the wood floors, vacuum, clean bathrooms, etc. in one shot. It's my least favorite day of the week, but at least things are clean for weekend guests and when I notice dust bunnies on Tuesday, I can relax because they'll be gone in a few days. Of course, with a 3-year-old boy's aim, a 9-month-old's enjoyment dropping his food and lots of playing in the yard, I do quite a bit of cleaning throughout the week too. I'm still trying to get the hang of taking care of a bigger place--anyone have any words of wisdom for me? Especially for big "spring cleaning" projects?

"Schooling"

2007-04-01T21:40:00.000-06:00

We decided not to put Bridger in a formal preschool this year for several reasons. I'm finally at home full-time, and he still has at least two school years until kindergarten--plus, we had no idea where to send him having just moved here. The biggest reason, however, is that we are still planning on homeschooling, though much will depend on the church-plant and how we feel like we are in the community at the time and lots and lots of prayer.
So, I've been doing some experimenting with a few non-invasive lessons here and there and in the last few months he seems to have started to enjoy learning (as opposed to previously when the more excited I was for him to learn something, the more squirrely he'd become). He was doing so well with his sounds that I decided to start "reading" some BOB books. He's really cute because he knows all the sounds, but doesn't quite understand the putting them together for words yet, so I think we're going to phase out BOB for the time being.

He is also suddenly interested in writing and coloring. I used to see all these nice children coloring and drawing, and then there was my son who would take all the caps off the markers and color on himself, if he didn't get too bored with it before he thought of that. Anyway, he just was able to write his name which made me feel like he's all grown up.

Birthday blessings

2007-03-22T19:48:00.000-06:00

One of my requests for my birthday last week was a family photo session. The day was beautiful so after a long walk we took some pictures outside. Here's two favorites.

St. Patty's Day Parade

2007-03-18T23:01:00.001-06:00

Check out this video of Bridger beggin for candy at the Missoula St. Patty's Day parade. We about died laughing:

The Silence of the Squirrels

2007-03-10T10:59:00.000-07:00

So we have a rickety wood shed attached to our garage that the previous owners used as a dog house and storage space for hay and things. Anyway, since we do not have a dog, the shed has become a haven for squirrels--they are everywhere and are chewing their way into our garage. We bought a trap for them, but they were smarter than it and kept getting the bait without getting caught, so yesterday Ryan bought a bb gun to finish them off.A little context here, these red squirrels are not native to Montana and are overrunning the place, killing lots of native bird species and are a general nuisance. Shooting them with a pellet gun is not illegal and is even encouraged (there was a recent article about it in the paper which also included several recipes for squirrel stew).

The first order of business yesterday was to clear out the shed of all the nesting material and break the plywood off the walls (their nest was in between the walls). Not only did we find several adult squirrels, but we found these--three newborns (click on picture to enlarge). They were chirping and burrowing and kind of gross, but also kind of cute.

Ryan suggested quietly burying them, but I just couldn't do it out there with Bridger so compassionate for them and holding my own little helpless baby. I have no problem with hunting or purging your property of appropriate vermin, but something in me would not allow Ryan to directly kill them.
Bridger's suggestion was that we take them to the park across the street to at least give them a chance. I liked this idea so we carefully nested them in a bucket, but when we got into the front yard we remembered that lots of dogs frequent the park and the squirrels would be sniffed out, so we decided to leave them in the bucket under a tree in our front yard.

I confess that part of the reason I left them in the bucket nest (besides it being a bit of protection) was that it would be easier to carry them away when they died. I really have no doubt that they will die or have already. We took them from their nest, exposed them to the air for awhile, displaced them, and to top it all off, Ryan shot their parents this morning through the bathroom window. But somehow it appeased my mother's conscience to let them die quietly or hope somehow that their mother or an adoptive mom would find them and carry them off to someone else's yard!

This has led to lots of lively discussion in the house. Bridger knows that daddy and grandpa hunt and has seen dead animals before; he likes to play hunting and "shoot" at his animals. This is all fine with me--he's a boy and it's part of life. But, there is also a respect that must be taught about animals--you don't kill animals with a low population or out of the appropriate season, you don't hunt animals you won't eat and you don't kill babies. Cruelty to animals in children is one of the biggest indicators of an adult serial killer, so I appreciate that Bridger had compassion for those little babies (he feels bad about the big ones too, but less so).

We also talked about how God put people as stewards over animals--it's okay to eat them and keep them from running over a town, but it's not right to kill them senselessly or kill them to extinction. Lots of life lessons and totally inadequate explanations on my part, but Bridger nods his head seriously and accepts it.

Okay, spring is coming

2007-03-04T19:52:00.000-07:00

Today was a beautiful day for the park and a long, long walk around the neighborhood. I know that I have borderline SAD (Seasonal Affect Disorder) because one day out in the warm sun and I am flooded with energy. I really need to ski next winter to get me out more (though a month of sick kids will still keep me off the slopes). Needless to say, I'm glad March is here. Even though the boys have been sick, they've been so cute together lately--here are a few pictures.

February blues

2007-02-25T19:31:00.000-07:00

So, its been awhile since I've blogged and it seems from other blogs that I frequent that everyone is in a bit of a lull this month. Somehow February is always a downer--you think the gray days should go quickly, after all it is the shortest month of the year, but it begins to feel like the longest for me. I keep all my digital pictures in folders for each month and it always seems that February is the slimmest--nothing ever happens! Oh, and don't let the snowman fool you, we made it an hour after it snowed and now the whole yard is green grass except for the snowman, who is still holding his own.

So, here are a few pictures of what we have been up to. Mostly, the kids have been sick and parked in their pajamas on the couch or in my arms. One will get better, the other goes down. This last bug has lasted at least a week and still going strong in Bridger. Asher picked it up a few days ago and sounds like a 40-year smoker. He can barely cry so what comes out is a raspy kitten yelp. I find myself laughing out loud at the poor kid. However, he has begun to eat almost everything put in front of him except baby food. Apparently he's too good for it since he's now eating real table food. The only way I can get him to eat off a spoon is if he puts it in his mouth himself. So, I guess I've got another strong-willed one!

2007-02-19T16:24:00.000-07:00

Ryan preached his first sermon as an ordained minister Sunday. Don't call him "pastor" though, as he won't know you're talking to him. I enjoyed the sermon as never before because it was the first time I heard it only from the pew (he didn't practice on me beforehand) and for what it's worth from his wife, he did a great job. You can listen to the sermon here (Christian's sermon from the week before is there too so check that out as well).

Valentines Day

2007-02-14T22:05:00.000-07:00

Valentines Day was never a huge deal for me and even less so since I've been with Ryan because his birthday is the day after so we usually make a joint celebration. This year may have been my best, however, as Ryan gave me the day off. I left in the morning and had a leisurely cup of chai at a cute downtown coffee shop and read The Memory Keeper's Daughter for an hour and a half. Then, I headed out to do a bit of shopping, driving and walking from store to store without a stroller, carseat carrier or shopping cart. Several times I caught myself unconsciously thinking I forgot a child in the car. I came home in the afternoon and was greeted by Bridger with a homemade bouquet of tissue paper roses he made for me that morning. He was just about to leave for a party with his kindergarten-age friend down the street so Ryan and I spent a nice afternoon together during Asher's nap. Then, we made dinner together, put the kids down early and enjoyed some molten chocolate cakes by the fire in the new ramekins I bought myself today. Oh the simple pleasures of life!

It's official

2007-02-11T15:30:00.000-07:00

My hubby was officially ordained last weekend at Gallatin Valley Presbyteriam Church with many family and friends present. It was a moving service with a true sense of culmination. Terry Traylor flew out to do the sermon for it, Steve Bostrom (a new church planter in Helena, MT) performed his vows and Christian did the charge. It was such a praise to have so many mentors there to share in the event. Ryan was very humbled to join the ranks of the elders of the church and we are both amazed at God's faithfulness through it all.

Bridger's new quilt

2007-01-31T22:22:00.000-07:00

I finished Bridger's animal quilt this week to his excitement. I've been working on it since before Christmas and it's the first project I've done here in the new house with the two kids. I love having a room set up with all my stuff so I can sew for five minutes if I have it instead of having to set up and tear down each time. However, it is a little harder to carve out time with two little munchkins needing my attention. It was also my first try with machine applique and it was easy and fun so I'll be doing some more of that.

I'm hoping to completely finish the boys room now with some paint and maybe a chair rail if I can get it on Ryan's honey-do list.

Independence

2007-01-26T14:10:00.000-07:00

It seems that the age of 3 brings more and more independence and exponential learning. Since his 3rd birthday Bridger has learned to dress and undress himself (choose his own clothing as well), make his bed, set the table and clear his own dishes after dinner, use the dustbuster to clean up under the table after meals, play a computer game, wash himself adequately in the tub, go overnight without a pull-up, and much more that I'm probably forgetting.

Right now we're working on wiping the bum (then all bathroom activities will be parent-less, though he will probably still feel the need to announce them after the fact), putting on shoes (not tie yet), and completely buckling his own carseat.

I do a double-take sometimes as he talks and acts like such a big boy these days. He says things like, "could you do me a favor and grab something from my father's office for me?" Can't wait for what comes next.

Ordained!

2007-01-25T21:38:00.000-07:00

Congrats to my lovely and smart husband who passed his oral ordination exams today and is officially a Rev! 3 years of seminary and 6 months of studying for these comprehensive exams and we are finally done.

The woes of photo studios

2007-01-17T19:48:00.000-07:00

So, I spent almost two hours getting Asher's 6 month pictures taken today at Sears. Silly me was thinking that it wouldn't be busy after the holidays and I could get in and out quickly. I neglected to take into account that because they weren't busy, the photographer would have hours on hand to hard-sell me endless "enhancements" while Asher went into a downward spiral of meltdown. All you moms out there know what I'm talking about.

Does anyone know these poor souls' story? Do they get commission? I try to be nice to the individuals, but I had to almost yell at her today to get her to finish up (why on earth would I want to pay an extra $25 for a cloudy border--seriously!). I'm not very good at combating their techniques. Obviously all the pictures are cute--it's my kid, but I can't wallpaper my house with photos. Buying some huge package for $250 does not technically "save" me $200.

I've had so many different experiences at these places. I've been to JCPenney several times with varying success. They're usually OVERLY busy, but less expensive and usually leave you alone with the computer to order. Sears seems to have consistently better quality photos but are more expensive and, as I had forgotten before today, very pushy.

Anyone have tips for these places? I suppose I don't have as many choices here in Missoula. Needless to say, the pictures turned out great and you can see them here. You have to log in with rachjanedietz@hotmail.com and the password is asherphotos. Check out the playboy pose--the photog would not give up on that one, even though I told her I didn't like it. Please resist the temptation to purchase sheets at $25 a pop.

Winter tidings

2007-01-12T20:48:00.000-07:00

My folks have been visiting the last week here with us and we've had a whirlwind of fun. Mom helped me make my first curtains, which was a little bit more of a chore than we were expecting it to be. The kids had a ball and are still adjusting to the quieter household where there's not someone to hold or play with them constantly.

Check out the album of more photos in the "view/download photos" link to the right.

Bum Genius? Part III

2007-01-03T19:42:00.000-07:00

Another update on my journey through babyhood using cloth diapers. You can find my previous musings here and here. Asher is six months old now and eating solids so things have begun to get interesting. I am still happy with my decision to go cloth but I have had to make a few modifications:

Dealing with the new poo: Asher's in the stage where he's still nursing a lot and only eating baby food, so things aren't exactly formed, if you know what I mean. Technically the two hot/cold washes can handle this, but I try to avoid as much soil as possible. I purchased a roll of biodegradable, flushable cloth liners that I try to strategically use once or twice during the day (Asher's pretty predictable). These work great, but are $6 for 100. Obviously this is nothing compared to buying disposable diapers, though, and a good option for us right now.

Washing the same diapers over and over: I have found that Tide with Febreeze does the best with to keep out stains and smells in the diapers. Dreft just makes them smell like pee before they're even peed in. I also use a 1/2 cup of baking soda in each load which freshens things up too and about once every two weeks I use a little bleach.

The same diapers with a growing baby: The BumGenius diapers are one-size, so they have snaps and velcro to make them adjust to different sizes. The diapers are in their largest snap now but can also be made bigger with the velcro. Asher was beginning to fill up and wet through sometimes so I bought a few thin inserts to supplement the regular insert. That seems to have done the trick during the day. For overnight, I double-up the large inserts. This keeps Asher dry, though is pretty bulky so I wouldn't really want to do that during awake time.

Asher still hasn't had a bit of diaper rash--a little dry skin occasionally, but I just let him go commando for awhile and it seems to clear up fine. Anyone else have any tips?

Christmas!

2006-12-30T20:52:00.000-07:00

Here are a few photos from our quite off-white Christmas. Ryan's entire family came in from three states for the occasion and it was great to be able to celebrate in our new home with plenty of room for all the relatives. The grown-ups stayed up late every night playing cards and boy those kids still got us up early! Christmas morning we almost had a casualty as Bridger was so excited he pulled down his stocking and the 10-pound snowflake holder fell smack down on his head. A big bump on the head didn't stop his excitement, though.

One of the hard times this year was going to a random church for Christmas Eve. We went to what we have found to be the best church in town, but they did a really strange service that involved hardly any good Christmas singing. Anyway, I was a bit disappointed, but Christmas was great all-in-all.

This year was another experiment in hanging out with all unbelievers. I joined a mom's club that had a Christmas party with a Santa to give presents. Anyway, we don't do Santa with the kids and so I had to sort of explain that in a way that didn't sound like we were in a cult. I got a bunch of "do you even celebrate Christmas?" even though I said we just wanted to focus on it as Jesus's birth. It's so trial and error trying to figure out how to say things that seemed pretty obvious in our previous life.

Fireside story by Bridger

2006-12-21T17:01:00.000-07:00

"One Sunday morning I woke up early and went fishing. I fished and fished and fished, but there were no fish. So, I said to myself, maybe the fish are at church. So, I went to church and sure enough, the fish were there playing in the band!" (copied verbatim)

I love this stage!

2006-12-18T20:09:00.000-07:00

Asher just learned to sit up this week and it is so much fun. I think this stage is my favorite of the first year--sitting up and playing, but staying put! Always smiles and laughs too. Asher also started solids last week. I wanted to wait until 6 months, but he just seemed so hungry. Bridger's always wanting to help, of course.

Oh, no ya don't!

2006-12-08T20:12:00.000-07:00

Asher's been sucking his thumb this week and we're trying to nip it in the bud. For those of you who think we're being too harsh on him, Ryan sucked his thumb until age 8 or something so we're just attempting to break the family cycle. Darn if he isn't cute when he does it, though.